“I don’t care” can be a harsh statement. It can potentially throw out negativity that doesn’t have to be there. The easiest way to pass off a hurtful comment is by saying “I don’t care.” But, that’s not always the truth. “I don’t care” said with defiance can bring even more power to the hurtful comment.
It’s helpful to remember that there will always be critics. The bigger your universe becomes the more critics you will have. It’s best to accept that not everyone is going to agree with you and to be okay with that. When you allow yourself to be vulnerable it’s always a hit to the gut when you have that one person that chooses to pull the trigger and let fly their opinion. We learn quickly at a young age how to stop allowing ourselves to share and be who we are because of being knocked down. Eventually we awake as adults and realize we don’t know who the hell we are because of the walls we’ve put up. Being aware of these walls brings a sort of conflict within. On one hand it feels really good to keep going with the flow, be yourself and to not care what people think. On the other hand it’s scary because as much as you hate to admit it, another person’s negative opinion of you stings a bit. Imagine you do something you’re very proud of. Eighteen people tell you how great it is, how talented you are and to keep it up. Then one person fires off an unsolicited “constructive” criticism. Now it doesn’t matter if a hundred people tell you how great you are, that one person throws you all off. You can say “I don’t care everyone else loves me.” But you may care. The phrase “I don’t care” is overused and a lot of times not true. We are humans and we are meant to care. People are entitled to their opinion. These days we are bombarded with people’s entitled opinions via the internet. Instead of saying I don’t care, we should learn to accept that there are going to be critics, there are going to be people who don’t agree with everything you believe or do and there will always be people that flat out just want to argue. “I don’t care” is a brush off statement and can have a negative under tones. Saying, “That’s okay” acknowledges the critic without an argument. It allows you to stand behind your truth and gives you strength and confidence. Saying “That’s okay” after someone disagrees may defuse your critic allowing for an unheated discussion on the issue. Imagine being on the receiving end of a “That’s okay” and a loving smile. How would that make you feel? Would it make you feel validated and recognized? You may not change your mind and the other person may not either, but it neutralizes the energy and can change the course of the conversation. The best part about it all being okay is that we don’t have to dislike the person on the other side. With families and friends it’s important to realize that we aren’t always going to agree. And that’s okay, because we love and respect each other and dammit we have a lot of fun together. It’s no fun and adds a lot of tension if we feel we have to stand our ground on opposite ends of an issue. All sorts of awesome things can happen from taking negativity out of words.
Criticism can be detrimental to an already fragile human being. It takes practice and courage to face criticism. When you find the truth of what you believe and who you are it gives you the stability to withstand the waves. Your armor is no longer an impenetrable wall, it is replaced by your truth and the love and respect you have for yourself.